I had a conversation with my teacher that was prompted by an AI discussion and then a question I asked AI in response to the discussion. Oddly, the response from the human, not the AI, left me thinking about relationships. In Soto Zen, we often speak of the importance of the teacher-student relationship. It is not merely a hierarchical connection or a formal structure—it is a living, mutual inquiry. The teacher serves not only as an authority in the conventional sense, but as a mirror and a companion on the path. Through this relationship, the student learns to see clearly, both inwardly and outwardly. Sometimes, seeing can be challenging.

But the significance of the relationship in Soto Zen extends beyond the zendo, beyond the Sangha, and beyond formal roles. Every interaction we have is a field of practice. Every person we meet offers a chance to express presence, compassion, and wisdom (something I sometimes feel I lack). We are not separate from one another; our lives are interpenetrated and moment by moment.

To care for a relationship with one’s teacher is to practice intimacy with truth. To care for relationships with others is to practice intimacy with life. Whether in silence or speech, in ease or difficulty, each relationship reveals the nature of interbeing. My teacher is a part of me, as are my friends and my colleagues, and even the random person I meet while listening to music.

To study the self is to forget the self. To forget the self is to be actualized by the ten thousand things. — Dogen Zeng

Relationships are part of those ten thousand things. We do not lose ourselves by attending to them with care and honesty. We find our true nature reflected in the eyes of others. So, let us not seek enlightenment apart from our relationships. Let us meet one another fully, with sincerity, humility, and compassion. In that meeting, the Way unfolds.

I hope I honor my teacher, my mentors, my colleagues, and my Sangha.